Been in OT for a month..so it seems!

Well as my previous post stated we were jumping back on the foster parent band wagon. The new agency had not contacted us in almost two months, that sent a red flag up for us, especially since the foster care industry is a 24/7 job.

In the time that we were waiting we found out we were pregnant again, September 12th, a day of mixed emotions. We were pregnant but how would the next 9 months be? Would it end like the time before or would we have a healthy baby in 9 months? We celebrated week 5, then 6, 7, 8, even 9 and then once again our lives stopped right before us once again. We miscarried our second baby on October 20th. I had an inpatient surgery on Monday, October 24th and I am now home recovering. This time has been different, living with the fear of miscarrying our baby for almost 9 weeks was horrible, I was depressed and not happy to be pregnant at all. Please don't get me wrong, we are so extremely hurt, sad, lost, confused about our baby that was made for heaven and not Earth. We have our moments of "losing it" and my husband is right there as soon as I need him. God has blessed me so much by giving me Jeremy! He is so perfect, perfect just for me!

We had planned on still getting our foster licenses even after we found out we were pregnant, (just in case) so we are now on the road to fostering again. I called another agency yesterday that we are familiar with and the were available to meet with us today. We turned alot of our paperwork in and I can not tell you how happy and excited we are. Maybe its part of the healing process for us, maybe not. I do know without a shadow of a doubt we are supposed to be foster and/or adoptive parents. I feel normal again. I feel like I have a purpose and I am fulfilling that purpose. We know we are going to receive criticism and we pray that God will prepare our hearts for that and that we will be able to handle it in a way that is pleasing to God.

Wow that was a full post, hopefully the next post is alot more fun with some Halloween and Biscuits 2nd Birthday pictures!!!

Friday Night Lights

My Coach! I am so proud of him for accomplishing his dream. He has waited so long for this day, been through so much and still came out on top! Way to go, Jeremy!

Review the play!

Its been a little while since I posted here last, I really do want to get better at this. I have discovered a new addiction! www.pinterest.com Its amazing, I cook something off of there almost every night and I hope to link up some recipes to my blog so you can try them too! I also have found a couple of new friends via blogging, pininterest and real life friends here in Menard. We are settling in really well. The cooler weather has been nice but Biscuit's allergies are going crazy with the change. I am going to start him back on breathing treatments tonight and in the mornings.

Well for the big news we are going to start forstering again. Before you jump to conclusions and think how crazy we must be and look down on us for fostering, please let me explain. (Both sets of parents flipped when we told them, one said "Dont you have enough already?", the other one said "I wish you wouldnt think about that and just focus on getting pregnant!"-this explains my forewarning) We are so excited but nervous at the same time that our families won't accept them because of their reactions, however if they do choose to treat my kids (foster, adopt, or bio) differently than the others that is their own fault and will ultimatley be their loss in the long run. How could you possibly look down on someone (not just us) for taking in an innocent child that needs a loving home. Anyways, enough venting--time for the happy stuff! We have prayed alot about deciding to open our home again. Jeremy never wanted to close in the first place but I told him I didnt want to deal with all the inspections and everything while we moved, however fostering hasn't left my heart. We continued to pray and seek God's will and we firmly believe this is God's will, I mean He practically wrote me a Facebook message! hehe! We are going to keep trying for another baby and accept any age foster kids 0-18 boys and girls (preferably boys, since I am a boy mom, lol) but if a girl comes with a sibling set I would be happy to accept them too! I hope we do get a sibling set, I love siblings! We are actually turning in our application to a new agency today and then it will take about 4-5 weeks to get us on the open list. We are going to do some respite in the mean time to get back in the swing of things. We're so excited to add some kiddos onto our roster!

Well I have to go start some snacks for the junior high football team today! It's our first game and I am pretty excited that Coach will actually be on the field instead of in the pressbox (like Friday nights). I'll try to post again soon! Blog at ya later! :)